taylor swift 3

Jigsaw Puzzle Singles Event: Mother/Daughter Edition.

“Why hasn’t anyone tried to puzzle-piece us yet??” Tara cried, as we collected our drinks at the bar.

I laughed. “Relax, we’ve only been here five minutes.”

She sighed.

“Now remember,” I instructed. “We’re undercover. No mention of the blog, okay? Undercover.”

“Undercover,” she repeated, nodding. “Right. No mention of the blog.”

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orphan black 2

Sick Day.

He was almost to the door. Soon, he’d be gone.

I called after him. “Hey Marc, wait!”

He turned back to me. “Yeah?”

I began rummaging around in my wallet. “Can you get me a pack of Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups while you’re there? Like the family-size pack?” Marc was off to Duane Reade to up our stash for the Office Gum Culture Task-Force. I found a 5 dollar bill and waved it at him. “But I mean, the mini-size, but in the family bag?” I sighed and shook my head. “Sorry, I’m not feeling well. I’m not making a lot of sense.”

He approached my desk and took the cash. “Sure, no problem.”

“Thanks,” I said. Then I turned back to my computer and tried to focus.

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reception 4

And Celebrate, We Did.

Thalia and Sean laughed lightly together as they hung the NQAC banner on the back wall of the Overlook second-floor patio for our One Year Anniversary Party. Sean was balanced on a chair and Thalia was unspooling wire to him as he fastened it around the nails they’d pounded into the wood.

Marlie and Bea chatted amiably at one of the tables. Marlie was folding the table-tents that Thalia had created which displayed our specialty drinks and announced our prizes. The graphics looked so professional and perfect, it made me shake my head in bewilderment. Bea was unfolding the white paper flowers which were to be placed in the pink cubed vases that would then be set out on the ten or so tables that scattered the space.

Jack and his team from Solerno and Lillet were calmly setting up the the two reception tables. White table cloths floated in the breeze and they weighed them down with their cute tote bags, which were to be gifts for all our guests. They then set up a red-framed chalkboard on which one of the girls carefully wrote out the drink specials.

The mood was serene yet festive, and filled with measured anticipation.

Clearly, no one but me could see the obvious:

WE WERE IN CRISIS MODE.

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Bach 2

Breathing Room.

“Oh my god,” McKenzie said, as I stepped up to her desk. “How was the party?

“It was so, so fun,” I said.

“Aw, I’m so glad,” she said, then she pointed at the little pile by her laptop. “Thank you for the coasters.” She hadn’t been able to make it to the party because she’d had to go on a last minute work trip. This annoyed us both. So I’d left her some NQAC coasters I’d had made for the event, so she could feel like she’d been a part of things.

“You’re welcome,” I said. “They’re so cute, right?!”

“So cute!” she said.

“I didn’t put many out at the bar because I just wanted to hoard them for myself. Not a very strong marketing plan on my part.”

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SMMMT

August 9th, 2013. Part Two.

“What?” I asked.

“You should…,” Floyd said slowly, as he adjusted our soundtrack. He then looked up at me. “Start a blog.”

“But…why?” I said.

“Because you can build an audience through it and then market the book to them. You’ll already have a set of readers when you publish it,” he answered. He then reached for another cookie.

“That’s the way a lot of writers get started these days,” Emily said, nodding.

“But…but what would I write about?”

Tara took a sip of her large Starbucks. “Write whatever. Write about your life.”

“Hmm,” I said. And then I remembered. “I did have this idea, a long time ago, about starting a blog about dating in your late 30’s in NYC? You know, never been married, no kids, late-in-life dating adventures? Something like that. I was going to call it ‘Not Quite A Cougar’.”

Lux laughed. “That’s funny.”

“I know,” I sighed and gave her a small smile. “Who would want to read that?”

“No,” she corrected. “I mean it’s funny. It’s a really good idea.”

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DJ

August 9th, 2013. Part One.

“Um, hi,” I said and cleared my throat. I clasped my hands in my lap to steady them. “Thank you guys for coming.” I took a deep breath. “I’ve asked you all here today because – “

“Hold up,” Floyd interjected. He was typing away on his laptop. “Every good meeting needs a soundtrack. Okay…okay,” He continued clicking. “And…BAM.” He hit a key definitively and looked up at me. “Now, we can start.” The room filled with House music.

“Okay,” I said slowly. “Thank you. Anyway…,” I started and looked over the group. I realized then how incredibly nervous I was.
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blonde

Good to Go.

“Those shoes are HOT!!” Lux replied after I’d sent her a picture of the outfit I’d put together for the NQAC One Year Anniversary Party.  “I want them!!!”

This made me laugh. Because of course, she’d picked them out.
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Date Six.

“So I was impressed you like Cards Against Humanity,” he said, as the waitress placed our mugs of coffee in front of us. “I love that game. I actually have all four Expansions.”

“Oh!” I said. “I didn’t realize there were other versions.”

“Yeah, they’re all great.”

“I’ll have to check them out then.”

Lily had been on vacation with her family and then needed to get settled in school, so she wasn’t available to be my Dating Intern until September. So I’d been in contact with Date Six myself. He had offered to meet at a quirky diner by my office for coffee and dessert. The only thing was, that afternoon we’d had an Office Make Your Own Sundae Party so I was not going to be having any dessert. I didn’t tell him this though. Then I’d probably blurt out that I’m President of The Fun Committee and frankly, that just seems like bragging.

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Steve Martin

Additional Headcount.

“TRACEY,” Lux said. “Were you nice?”

“Yes, I was nice,” I said, as I opened my laptop.

“But were you POSITIVE?” She took a sip of her Starbucks. This was her third Venti of the day. And well…it showed.

“Yes Lux,” I sighed. “I was positive.”

“Did you talk about The Cat?” asked Floyd from across the conference room table.

“Oh my god,” Lux gasped. “Did you? Did you talk about The Cat?”

“No. I did not talk about The Cat.”

“Well, what was it then?” asked Lainie, as she reached for a bribery cookie. These cookies were the only way I got people to come to these meetings.

“Guys, I don’t know. He just wasn’t into me. Let’s move on.” I had gathered the members of my Social Media Marketing Team in order to brainstorm ideas on how to get a big surge of readers before our One Year Anniversary Party, which was coming up soon. Instead, all they wanted to discuss was my failure with Date Five.

Complete. Chaos.

As usual.

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Living, Working & Dating as a 40-Something Single in NYC

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