Tag Archives: Zac Efron

99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall, 99 Bottles of Beer. Take One Down, Pass It Around…(Well, you know the rest).

“Okay. So it’ll start like this: ‘You know those movies, those movies you can watch over and over and never get sick of? They might not be particularly good but for whatever reason they strike something in you and they become your go-to movies whenever you can’t figure out what to watch. I have three. In no particular order, they are: ‘Rock Star,’ which I love because the music reminds me of high school and it makes me nostalgic for my hometown’s illicit parties when parents were out of town. We’d lift our beers together and scream out Motley Crue and make out on porches and it honestly felt like life couldn’t get any better. The next is ’17 Again.’ I love this one because Zac Efron is brilliantly hysterical in it. No really, he is – ‘”

“No really, he is.” Marlie said nodding and took a sip of her coffee. We were wrapping up our Sunday-After-New-Year’s-Brunch at Park Avenue Winter and I was telling her about my next post. Continue reading 99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall, 99 Bottles of Beer. Take One Down, Pass It Around…(Well, you know the rest).

IF YOU ARE NEW TO THE BLOG, START HERE: When One Door Closes, Another One Opens. Even If You Have to Kick It Down.

“You’re too pretty.”

“You intimidate men.”

“Your online dating profile is too long, it makes you look crazy.”

“You look down too much when you walk.”

“You don’t get out enough.”

“You have your headphones in when you’re on the subway.”

“You come across as a bitch when people first meet you.”

“New York City is a hard place to meet someone.”

“You just haven’t found the person who will accept your flaws.”

“You don’t say ‘hi’ to strangers.”

“You don’t try hard enough.”

“You have a cat. It makes it look like you’ve given up.”

“You don’t show enough cleavage.”

These are the reasons people have given me for why I am still single at 42. As each of my friends have paired off over the past decades, I’ve often wondered why it really is that I am still single. It certainly wasn’t what I’d hoped for or planned. What was I doing wrong? I have my own list of why I think I’m still single. It is:

I never meet anyone my own age.

I hate shopping so my wardrobe is still stuck in 1995.

I would rather be home watching Investigation ID than go out.

I need to lose 10 pounds.

I have a compulsion to drunk-text.

I know nothing about music.

I can’t cook. I smoke cigarettes.

I’m an over-sharer.

I talk too much and too loudly.

I always look tired because I have insomnia. Or I’m hungover.

I’m too needy.

I’m too pale.

I have a cat. It makes it look like I’ve given up.

I don’t show enough cleavage.

I recently reconnected with my high school boyfriend. I hadn’t talked to him in 14 years but I can say honestly, he’d never been far from my mind. I’d always loved him. When we got back together six months ago, I said to myself, “This is why I’ve been single for so long! High School Sweethearts Reunited! What a great story this will be! I can’t wait to update my Facebook status!” But it was not meant to be. I was crushed. I thought this was finally my Happily Ever After. Continue reading IF YOU ARE NEW TO THE BLOG, START HERE: When One Door Closes, Another One Opens. Even If You Have to Kick It Down.