Saturday Night Adventure.

“We want adventure.”

“What?” I put the phone on the kitchen counter and clicked it to speaker. “Picturing me strutting around in my jeggings wasn’t enough of an adventure for you?”

She laughed. “No, that was fun. We love hearing about your progress and we’re all cheering you on but really, it’s time to start dating again. Just like you said. That’s what we all want to read about.”

I sighed. “I know.”

Continue reading Saturday Night Adventure.

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Strut.

I think we can all agree there’s nothing more tedious and annoying than an artist discussing their ‘process.’ They’ll spout on about their ‘craft’ and their ‘inspiration’ and how they ‘see the world differently’ than the rest of us and then they’ll tell you about the speck of dew they saw on a young leaf that morning, and how it relates to them entering as the new kid in the middle of first grade. Maybe their voice will waver and they’ll get a tear in their eye.

And you’ll want to kill yourself.

So I try not to do that here.

I mean, that shit is BORING.

Continue reading Strut.

The More Things Change, The More They Stay the Same. Or… Part Two.

At first, I was too stunned to speak.

And then I almost said, “I’m touched.”

But that seemed inappropriate.

I tried out in my mind, “I’m flattered.” But that also seemed weird for a work exchange.

So instead, I just said: “Thank you. Thank you so much.”

Continue reading The More Things Change, The More They Stay the Same. Or… Part Two.

The More Things Change, The More They Stay the Same. Or… Part One.

I was pretty sure I was about to get fired. Like seriously. Wade and his team didn’t need me in the same capacity anymore and in a surprising plot-twist, RJ had left the company. Although I still was supporting Seth and maintaining my duties on the Wellness Committee, not to mention my important role of President of the Fun Committee, I knew that no company would see this as a full workload. I wondered vaguely if I should start working on my resume.

Continue reading The More Things Change, The More They Stay the Same. Or… Part One.