At first, I was too stunned to speak.
And then I almost said, “I’m touched.”
But that seemed inappropriate.
I tried out in my mind, “I’m flattered.” But that also seemed weird for a work exchange.
So instead, I just said: “Thank you. Thank you so much.”
“Well, everyone here speaks highly of you and I’ve been told you want to do more. And I’ve heard about your writing. So I think this will be a perfect fit.”
“Me too,” I breathed.
“So can you go out to our West Coast office next week to train?” my new boss asked.
“Yes!” I exclaimed, probably a little too enthusiastically. “Yes.” I lowered my voice to office proper. “Yes. Of course I can.”
“Good,” she said. “They’re ready for you.”
I scampered back to my desk, galvanized to step up my game so I wouldn’t let my new boss down. But after a few moments, I realized I was too keyed up to sit still, so I ran around the office and told everyone of the new addition to my role. Somehow they already knew, but still, they all fist-bumped me and high-fived me and said kind things like, “Finally!!” and “Congratulations!!” and “You deserve this!!”
After I’d made my loop, I returned to my computer to find notes from my friends in the West Coast office saying how happy they were that I’d be working more closely with them. They seemed genuinely delighted. I sat there for at least 20 minutes with a stupid manic grin on my face.
Now, I don’t think it would be in my best interest right now to get into what this new aspect of my job will be. But I will say, it is something that matters, it is something that affects the company and how people see the company. I will still be supporting Seth and my new boss and still on my Committees but this will be adding a whole new skill-set for me. A skill-set that is important.
I am so, so excited.
And also, terrified.
What if I can’t do this? It will require a lot of knowledge of our company and our product. Knowledge I do not have.
In fact, when I told one of the guys on the Development Team, his response was, “This is great. You’re a great writer so you’ll be really good at it.” Then he smiled at me. “But now of course, you’ll have to learn how to use the product.”
“Right!” I pointed at him. “You’re exactly right. First order of business – learn how to use the product!”
He must have seen the flash of fear cross my face because then he said, “You can come to us whenever you have questions. Don’t worry, we’ll help you.”
“Thank you,” I said sincerely.
As I’ve mentioned, I am hopelessly inept at anything technological, (which is what my company is). I am known for being the one who says, “Wait. How does this work? What the…? Floyd! Can you just do this for me???” But I can’t do that anymore. This role requires me to learn for myself.
And not only that, it requires me to take my job seriously. I will have to be on point. No more days of saying, “Oh well, I can put that off until tomorrow. What’s UP ‘Scandal’ recap?!” No more days of rolling into the office tired and hungover after having too-late wine phone chats with Tina. Someone has finally, finally taken a chance on me. And I will need to be good and I will need to be accountable. I’ve never really had that before.
And it is daunting.
So yes, I am scared.
But mostly, I am excited.